Quotes"If your dog is
fat, you aren't getting enough
"Some days you're
the dog; some days you're the hydrant."
"Whoever said you
can't buy happiness forgot about puppies."
years, I'm dead."
"To his dog,
every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of
"A dog teaches a
boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three
times before lying down."
"Did you ever
walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think
that's how dogs spend their lives."
"I loathe people
who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts
to bite people themselves."
"No animal should
ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless
absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the
what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back
from a grocery store with the most amazing haul
chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the
greatest hunters on earth!"
"I wonder if
other dogs think poodles are members of a weird
"My dog is
worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents
a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
"If I have
any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I
have known will go to heaven, and very, very few
"You enter into a
certain amount of madness when you marry a person with
your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you
"Cat's motto: No matter what you've done
wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did
"Money will buy
you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his
appreciates the very special genius of your conversation
as the dog does."
"A dog is the
only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves
"Man is a dog's
idea of what God should be."
"Women and cats will do as they please,
and men and dogs should relax and get used to the
Robert A. Heinlein
"In order to keep
a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should
have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will
"Of all the
things I miss from veterinary practice, puppy breath is
one of the most fond memories!"
-Dr. Tom Cat-
"There is no
psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your
"When a man's
best friend is his dog, that dog has a
"The average dog
is a nicer person than the average person."
"He is your
friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are
his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours,
faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You
owe it to him to be worthy of such
"If you pick up a
starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite
you; that is the principal difference between a dog and
upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great
"I've seen a
look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed
contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think
humans are nuts."
If you can start
the day without caffeine or pep pills,
If you can be
cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,
If you can resist
complaining and boring people with your troubles,
can understand when loved ones are too busy to give you
If you can overlook when people take things out on
you when, through no
fault of yours, something goes
If you can take criticism and blame without
If you can face the world without lies and
If you can conquer tension without medical
If you can relax without liquor,
If you can sleep
without the aid of drugs,
If you can eat the same food
everyday and be grateful for it,
If you can do all these
things, then you are probably the family